Making Decisions in Jesus Youth Groups - Our Approach (BJRE018)

Making Decisions in Jesus Youth Groups - Our approach

(By Dr. Edward Edezhath - Published in Kairos Magazine in 2019)

“There is a retired priests’ residence not far away. Why don’t we visit them one afternoon?” Akhil made this suggestion in the Jesus Youth core group. Four or five of the nine members thought it was a very good idea. Some others were hesitant; others were undecided. They had to decide whether to accept and go or not. 

Making decisions is a very important part of daily life. We all make many personal decisions daily; some are insignificant, like how much of a dish I should serve on the plate or if I should read this book more now. Some personal decisions could be of greater significance, like which course of study I should take or when I will exercise daily.  Then again, there is a whole category of decisions involving other people, at home or work. Our decisions take us forward in life, both personally and community. We often focus on WHAT we decide and forget HOW we reached that decision.  Don’t forget that how we make group decisions builds up or weakens our groups. 

I used to give ‘slogan making’ exercises in our training programs during the early days of Jesus Youth. Three groups would gather to make a catchy slogan for a proposed program, but their leaders would be selected earlier and instructed to lead the group in a certain way. The first is an ‘autocratic’ leader, the second is just ‘playful’, and the third is ‘participative’. Without the group realizing it, the leaders would be asked to push their styles when the group does the planning. Some people would also observe how the groups interact. Then, the groups would start their slogan-making. If everything goes well, the group of the ‘autocrat’ or the authoritarian leader would either have a fierce fight or end up with many people very silent and deeply hurt. In the ‘playful’ leader’s group, first, they would enjoy the fun, and after that, when they saw that nothing was happening, the group would become quite restless, and sometimes they too would fight. However, in the participative group, almost always, they would come out not just with a very attractive slogan and plan but also with a sense of unity and visible satisfaction with the goal achieved. In the second part of the session, all would gather, reflect on what happened, and take their tips on leadership and decision-making. 

The greatest strength of the Jesus Youth movement is its active fellowships. There are informal friendship gatherings, regular meetings like prayer groups, cells, and households, and coordinating teams and councils. At all these levels, knowingly and unknowingly, we make decisions. As I mentioned, the ‘what’ of these decisions is important, but the ‘how’ is more important. The above slogan was made to highlight the ‘how.’ This ‘how’ will show the spiritual maturity of the persons in that group. More than that, the group will grow in love and unity by attentive and participative decision-making.

Attitudes to Good Decisions

Before we discuss the decision-making process in a group, it would be useful to ask what attitudes are important for united decision-making. 

1. Respect: Each group member is a child of God and has the indwelling Holy Spirit. Our worldly prejudices often make us forget this. A person’s age, education, social position, and gender considerations must not stop us from giving that person due respect. This attitude makes us real disciples of Christ and lays the foundation for united decisions.

2. Listening: ‘As you did it to one of the least of these my brethren, you did it to me’ (Mt. 25: 40, 44). God speaks especially to insignificant people; an openness that will make us listen to what they say or don’t say is very important in group decisions. 

3. Accept variety: “You are the body of Christ and individually members of it” with differing charisms (I Cor 12: 27). Some speak gently and systematically, some are loud and insistent, and some are always confused and doubting, but accept all their contributions to building the body of Christ. 

4. God’s plan: Seek God’s plan, and ‘whatever you do, do all to the glory of God’ (1 Corinthians 10:31). So, it is important to look for the Lord’s plan, especially through reflection and listening in prayer.

5. Disinterestedness: What is this important attitude of following God’s will? ‘This is what I would like to happen, but, Lord, let you will be done.’ Realizing what I wish, yet fully resigned to the decision of the body of Christ, is the holy attitude of detachment, much needed for group decisions.

6. Don’t hurry: When convinced of a plan, you want to hurry. However, in a group, people are at different stages of being convinced. A good principle in group decisions is not to hurry or push for a conclusion.

7. Peace and unity: In building the Kingdom, ‘make love your aim’ (1 Cor.14:1). After all discussions and arguments about an issue, our goal is that the group reach a united stand. This is one of the best ways to grow in the experience of God's love and to build enduring fellowships.

Be joyful always! After a decision comes all the work to reach the goal set, but we must not forget that every good decision is a big step in partaking of the love and life of the Trinity. The work of the Lord comes alive through a group of disciples taking decisions together and growing in love. As Jesus said, “If two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven” (Mt.18:19).

(To be continued)

= Pointers for Reflection =
1. In the groups you know, what kinds of decisions do they have to make?
2. What are some of the wrong approaches to decision-making that you are aware of?
3. How can we involve children in the decision-making in our families?
4. Talk about the important and helpful attitudes that lead to the right decision-making.